“Without knowing what I am and why I am here, life is impossible.” ~ Leo Tolstoy (Tweet)
Have you ever wondered who you were, deep inside, in your heart and soul and the marrow of your bones? Do you ache to know? To get a glimpse into the mystery of your own worth and value?
If so, you’re not alone. Every month, about 101 million searches (or over a billion annually) ask Google for insight into the perennial question: “Who am I?”
Judging by the reported increases in depression, anxiety, suicide, drug use and other social/psychological indicators there seems to be something of an identity crisis of pandemic proportions seeping into the consciousness of a growing disillusioned and disengaged mass of lonely people.
This identity crisis seems to be mostly felt as a general emptiness and sense of directionlessness. But others feel it much more viscerally, as a pain in the gut, a vacancy in the soul, a throb at the temples.
What about You?
Do you feel lost, unmoored and adrift in a sea of self-doubt, wondering who you truly are? Do you feel your value has been so much spare change in the ashtray of life?
Or do you sense there is something deeper than that, something you haven’t yet been able to put a finger on, but that seems vaguely more, like you were destined for something but haven’t yet been able to make out in the shadows what that thing is?
Standards of Value
And how should a person’s ultimate value be measured, anyway? Should it be the accountant’s yard stick? Rank and title? The value of reputation and legacy?
There is no obvious way to measure who you are and what you’re worth. But some yard sticks are better than others.
- If sold for our chemical elements (our bodies are composed of so much sulfur, sodium, chlorine, magnesium, iron, iodine, silicon, etc), our value would be something close to the price a candy bar or a single scoop of ice cream.
- If you were to sell a body to the cadaver industry to be stripped for parts, you could pocket about $80,000.
- Mexican and Nigerian kidnappers get about $50,000 per unfortunate soul. Somali pirates and Radical Islamist Militants (a small and twisted faction of the larger Muslim community) get an average of $5 million per kidnapping.
- In California (my home state), it costs an average of $47,000 to incarcerate each prisoner each year of their sentence. So a life term, of say 50 years, would cost $2,350,000 for each and every lifer.
- Medicare pays $55,000 to keep cancer victims alive even if it means they live for only one more year.
- It also paid $40,000 to surgically implant a defibrillator in a 93 year-old man with terminal cancer to keep his ticker ticking long enough for his cancer to kill him.
- The US Food and Drug Administration has valued a human life at $86 million when you take into account the anticipated tax revenue we generate over a lifetime, bone marrow, egg, sperm and blood donations, and the value of other marketable parts (like heart, eyes and kidneys).
So, are you feeling better about yourself?
You just went from the value of a small bag of peanut M&Ms all the way up to the price of a small island in about 200 words! How does that feel?
What it all Means
So what does it mean that the value of our lives can be measured along a spectrum that ranges anywhere between the value of a juice box and Oprah Winfrey’s Montecito mansion?
Well, frankly, nothing.
The monetary value of a person pales in significance to what is truly valuable about humanity (and any particular jeans-wearing part of that 7 billion member clan).
You are more than the value of your parts. You are worth infinitely more than the cost of sustaining you. You are worth more than the tax revenue you generate, the value of your labor or investment potential or service you will have rendered by the time you kick the bucket. You are worth more than what the state pays to keep you alive or lock you up or what bad guys would ask as ransom.
Your True Value
You see, your value is incalculably infinite. Your worth is eternal. Who you are is so much more than what you do or what you have done or what you will do. It’s more than the number of friends you have or the size house you live in or the kind of car you drive or the number of Facebook friends or Twitter followers you can brag about.
As a matter of fact, such things have little to do with who you are or what you’re capable of or what you’re truly worth.
So, Who Am I?
You are an infinite being with an infinite heritage. You are the child of Love, of Power, of Creativity, Divinity, Spirit, Soul and Godliness.
You are, in fact, a child of God.
Can you fathom what that means? Can you imagine the implications of such a thought to your limitless potential?
Think about what that says about you, deep inside, about your innate value, your inherent worth, about who you are below the surface of your skin, below the income, below the insecurities and humiliations and fears and anxieties and ribbons and trophies and wins and losses and missteps and failures and victories and sins and trips and stumbles and every other significant and insignificant way we define and describe and identify and evaluate ourselves.
You are a wonderful and wondrous creation of Heaven. You are an angel on loan. An indestructible life of deep and abiding significance—whether realized, accepted, felt or not.
The Sum of Creation
You are the sum of all creation. You are the cherry on the sundae, the cap of snow on the mountaintop, the crème de la crème of life. You. Inside. Perhaps hidden by years of put-downs and offenses and shoves into life’s corners and verbal and physical slaps to the ego, the heart and face.
But there, perhaps submerged or buried, subdued, sunk somewhere inside of you, but there, still alive, ticking, beating, waiting, is a life that is glowing, the embers of which are still lit, whose heart still pumps, whose potential is still eternal and amazing and breathtaking.
Truth Caught in an Infant’s Face
If you’re not sure I speak the truth, try this: Look into the face of a sleeping infant. Now do you see it? That’s you. You are the infant God sees, slumbering, not yet fully awake, waiting to be born into an awareness that you are more than the sum of your parts or the peculiar algebra of your past and anticipated future.
You are, in short, so much more than you see in the mirror. You are more than your suspicions and doubts. You are eternal, endowed with embryonic glory. You are but the tip of a gigantic iceberg of potential and possibility. (Tweet) Most of your greatness waits to be discovered below the surface of your self-acceptance.
You matter. You are worth more than the human mind can imagine. Even if you wince as you read this or scream obscenities at my words, you know somewhere deep inside, in a quiet moment, something whispers the truth of what I’m saying to you. Hang on to that whisper.
Then let it sink inside and grow larger, expanding to fill your consciousness. Sit with it. Feel it. Know it. Accept it. Believe it. Act on it. It will speak the truth to your heart and mind, breathing life back into your weathered soul, even if ever so quietly at first.
Afterthoughts
You are the embodiment and personification of synergy, something greater than, bigger, grander, more profound and beautiful than your elements, parts or history.
Go claim it. Go realize it. Go bask in the warmth of that realization. And then go to work reflecting that reality. But don’t get fooled into believing the degree to which you don’t yet reflect it is an indication of some cosmic subtraction on your worth and value.
Who you are is not only what you see or remember or feel or believe you are worth. It is also what is beneath it all. It is what God sees in you. It is what God planted in you. It is the spark of divinity.
Let that be the starting point from which you fashion a life and the image you see in the mirror behind the eyes staring back at you.
In the 1970s, there was a TV game show called To Tell the Truth where 3 people would claim to be the same person. The contestant would ask questions to try to determine which one was the real person in question. At the end, the host would call out, “Would the real so-and-so please stand up!” The real person would stand and the contestant would win or lose.
Here’s the good news. I’m telling you who the real person is at the beginning of the game. The outcome is rigged. The answer is fixed. You win if you but call out the truth. “Would the real you please stand up!”
Now, let the deeper, potential you, the one that glows within, that is connected to the eternities, that glistens with the effervescence of the divine, let that person now stand up.
And then smile as you realize how profoundly, gratefully and confidently happy you can be about that bit of identity clarity.
Your Turn …
If this message resonated with you or you think it would have value to others, please share it far and wide to help stave off the growing identity-amnesia that’s infecting the hearts and souls of far too many people.
And, as always, we would love to read your thoughts in the comments below.
Thank you! I love this. You are worth as much as someone is willing to pay for you. And Someone paid the ultimate price.
So glad you liked the article, Tina. It was from the heart. I think the more we understand the spiritual roots of who we are, the easier it will be to see in ourselves something much more profound than most recognize. In this case (only), pedigree matters.
Inspirational words, I think that most of us have no idea about that, although it is really important for a healthy self-confidence…
Mia recently posted … Beim Zahnarzt mit dem Sohn
So many people’s sense of self, their self-confidence, is built on very sandy ground. Insecurity, fear and anxiety about identity is too often the result. But understanding who we truly are can help us see more clearly the real identity we share.
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts here, Mia.
Thanks for all the great reminders Ken! This is so important to contemplate daily. I appreciate your breakdown of the value of just our physical beings–which is pretty amazing–but as you say is really nothing compared to our mental, emotional and spiritual selves. And I also love your line, “You are but the tip of a gigantic iceberg of potential and possibility. ”
Kathy recently posted … Are You Worthy of Love, Happiness and Success?
We are truly amazing beings, Kathy. And yet we usually experience so little of the potential that flows in our veins and beats in our hearts and waits to be unleashed. We can be so self-limiting. We forget or doubt or ridicule the idea that we can be so much more than we often give ourselves credit for.
And so we settle for the way things are instead of creating the lives we dream of living. Most of the work of creation, however, is not on the structure of the life we want, but on its guts; it’s mostly internal work. It’s working on what we believe about ourselves and life and what and how we think, our attitudes and habitual interpretations. Change how we think and what we believe and we change our lives in profound ways.
Thanks for your thoughts here, Kathy. Very much appreciated.
Sooner or later each one of us will ask that question who am I and ultimately God will ask the same question about you…. choose wisely.
That’s a powerful way to look at it, John. Thanks for adding that perspective.
You won’t think I have dukkha (suffering). You think my life is unending bliss? It is dukkha on top of dukkha; a different kind of dukkha though, but dukkha nonetheless. I endure it; I work on it; I have to pay the price. I suffer but I don’t complain. I hope I am worthy of my suffering, suffering observed calmly.
Jennie H. Merritt recently posted … No last blog posts to return.
I wouldn’t presume to speak to your suffering without knowing the details of what you’re expereincing.
But sometimes suffering can be made much more tolarable when we find purpose in it. People like Viktor Frankl and other Holocaust survivors who have been able to derive some meaning from their suffering have transformed it to some degree.
He suggests any form and degree of suffering is made lighter when we are able to discover and hold on to some sense of meaning in our lives. He even called his brand of therapy logotherapy, which means “meaning” therapy.
So maybe the secret to diminishing the suffereing is to see what it is saying to you, what it points at, what you can learn about life or yourself from expereincing it.
“A lot of us spend our time stuck in regret, wishing our lives had turned out differently, and beating ourselves up for the decisions that have led us to this place. We feel cheated out of a life that could have been something better. We feel angry and sad and disappointed. And most of all, we feel stuck.
Solomon C. Hale recently posted … No last blog posts to return.
That’s true, Solomon. Regret fills countless hearts over what could have happened and what could have been. Feeling stuck is such a disheartening feeling. I guess the advice I would give such a person is to try focusing on the next step. What has been can’t change. Commiserating over that does nothing but lead to despair.
Instead, decide what direction we want to move toward and take a step in that direction. If I always wanted to be an actor, for instance, and now feel it’s too late, that I can never fulfill my calling now, what I was supposed to do, that circumstances have pinned me to a different life, I can still take a step. Instead of regretting what I never did, I can go online to look for local acting classes or groups who put on local plays for elementary schools or find a blog that teaching basic acting skills. The key is to take the step. In stepping, in taking action, and focusing there instead of on the unchangeable past, so much of the regret and despair can start to dissipate.
We don’t have to get paid for the thing we yearn to do. We just have to do it. If our hearts call us to write or sing or build or run or teach and for one reason or another, there is no way we can see making a change in our careers now, that’s okay. The point of life isn’t to make a living doing what we love. The point is simply to do what we love.
Making that shift in our mindset can also pull us back from a life of regret and disappointment and replace it with the passion that come from doing what we feel we were meant to do, even if it’s not full time or is done only on weekends.
um, no. I am NOT in fact a child of god. I AM in FACT a child of my mother. Just had to correct you on that mistake you made.
Thanks for coming by and considering what I shared in the post. A couple thoughts…
1. I am at once both a man and a human, a mammal and an Earthling, a person and a living organism. We are, in fact, many things simultaneously. Being one thing (your mom’s child) does not prevent you from also being something else (a child of God)
2. Your evident disbelief in God doesn’t mean God does not exist (nor does my belief in him prove his existence, for that matter). But the insistence that there is no God is an odd one. The lack of sugar in my pantry does not prove there is no such thing as sugar (even if I’ve never experienced sugar). The fact that I have never seen, tasted or heard of a thing does not mean that thing does not exist. And t lack of your own personal experience with God does not prove his absence either.
3. Some humility about what does and what doesn’t exist goes a long way toward learning more than you ever thought possible to learn.
Another top drawer post Ken as usual. too many people suffer from low self worth and esteem.
Neil Butterfield recently posted … Mineral Supplements: Is The Cheap Stuff Worth The Money?
Thank you so much very true and a way of me finding myself. very helpful.
Thankyou for your truly insightful and thoughtful words -a beacon of light in a maelstrom of hopelessness…
I have always known God, and some how have always known my purpose. I’m not saying I didn’t fight against it or struggle with it, but I have always known I was going to be a foster parent to at least one child. I seriously remember praying for this as a small child. Right after I got married, my sister-in-law came to live with us. She was 13 and had been sexually abused and neglected. She is 17 now and despite all the love we give her she doesn’t know her own worth. I understand teens are generally a walking identity crisis but that is exactly why she needs to know her value before she goes into the world. I never felt the struggle like she does and aside from talking to her about it and proving to her that she is loved unconditionally. I don’t know how to change something so personal and internal as the little voice inside your that guides you.
Apply the great technique that can help you manifest abundance, love, and wealth is affirmations. Affirmations are positive statements you can use to make your thoughts, emotions, and beliefs more in tune with the law of attraction.
Amazer Me recently posted … Powerful Abundance Affirmations for Manifesting Wealth
Sorry, my friend, but I’m a pretty firm disbeliever in the law of attraction.
Once you get into the research, LOA falls apart. Compared to goal setting, LOA falls short, even though compared to doing nothing, it’s better.
The reasons are clear. “Manifesting” something puts it into our thoughts, which keeps us focused on the results we want. As we focus on the end we want, we are much more likely to take action producing that end. The reason goal-setting works even better is that you’re not only thinking about what you want, you are determining specific actions to produce it.
And don’t even get me started on the physics (vibrational attractions and the like) that true believers tend to talk about. Don’t believe me, just talk to any trained physicist about it. You’ll get an ear-full.
A spiritual advisor ask me to put into words what I am worth,I got stuuck,stuck, If I k …
. NEW what my higher power thought ,I wouldn’t need to think,for he gave us a,,brain to think,put one foot in front of the other and leave the results up to god,remove a stone on your path so the next traveler won’t have to trip on it.14 billion years give or take and we are on this ark drifting in space ,talking about miracles, that’s a miracle