Broken

I’ll tell you a dream
That I had in my sleep
A story, a vision
A reminder to keep:

I stood at the steps
Of the Heavenly Mansion
Before Pearly Gates
With deep apprehension

A pit in my gut
And the shame of my past
Filled me with dread
And remorse, and disgust.

I felt like a fraud,
A deceiver, a liar.
I’m guilty, imperfect
I’m ripe for the fire

I fall short, I am weak
Impatient, unkind
I’m lost and I’m broken
I’m spiritually blind

In my natural self
I’m worldly wicked
I stumble and fall
My landing—can’t stick it!

In darkness, a sinner
I wait for the Gate
To open up slightly
Enough for a shake …

A finger wagged at me
A disappointed tone
A groan of rejection
Not enough, all alone

A blemish, a blister
A source of great pain
Paid by the Master
A judgment of shame

As I wait, my knees quiver
My head spinning darkly
The mighty gates tremble
They part ever slightly

There in the opening
Between pearly bars
Stood a man in a robe
Shining brighter than stars

Tears fill my eyes
A lump in my throat
My knees buckle forward
I’m lost and I’m broke

I cry, “I’m unworthy!”
His presence too bright
He then steps toward me
I back up in fright

He reaches down to me
He lifts me and holds me
He steadies my knees
As I wait for his scolding

I cry on his shoulder
He sheds a tear too
But for me? “No!” I whisper:
“I’m unworthy of You.”

So I wait for his judgment,
For justice to strike
But he doesn’t release me
He holds me so tight

His mouth then comes close
To my ear as he claims:
“You fell short of God’s glory
You were off on your aim.”

I nodded “yes” knowing
Of course he’s correct
My eyes are cast downward
In shame and regret

Then he said it so clearly
Speaking straight to my heart
“I paid for your debt
In full; not in part

“You had faith and believed
Followed best as you could
When I asked you to try
You said that you would

“And even though mostly
Your effort was flawed
Your debt has been paid
By my love and my blood

“Sure, you’re imperfect
And sure, you are broke
But my burden was light
When you took up my yoke

“You see, I was the one
To whom you were linked
I was the one who pulled
When you’re weak

“You’re burden was light
Because I made it worth it
I am the glue that makes
broken things perfect.”

Free photo by Pixaby