“Men often become what they believe themselves to be. If I believe I cannot do something, it makes me incapable of doing it. But when I believe I can, then I acquire the ability to do it even if I didn’t have it in the beginning.” ~ Mahatma Gandhi
Belief is to our lives what a foundation is to a building. The height and security and reliability of the structure is dependent on the quality of the foundation it’s built upon. A shaky or unsure foundation cannot produce a sound structure. So with our lives. If our beliefs about ourselves or life are shaky and unsure, no amount of artificially-forced positive thinking or affirmations or anything else will help. You have to steady the foundation to build the tower erect, able to withstand stresses placed on it by the elements.
NOTE: Both this and a previous post titled, 5 Beliefs that Will Radically Change Your Life Forever are combined in a single article in Ayo Olaniyan’s e-magazine, Life Skills Magazine. Go check it out!
5 Beliefs that can Change the Trajectory of your Life
1. Believe nothing is impossible
What it means: You are an amazing work of art. You are a mechanical miracle. You are an engineering impossibility. And yet, here you are. Historically, most things we take for granted today were once considered impossibilities: The telephone, the radio, the camera, the car, the computer.
- It was impossible to run a mile under 4-minutes … until Roger Bannister ran it.
- It was impossible to fly … until the Wright Brother showed us it wasn’t.
- It was impossible to go to the moon … until Neil Armstrong stepped onto its surface.
What it does: You don’t allow others to place limits on your world. You seek the possible. You look for ways around and through and over. You think out of the box as needed to accomplish what others think can’t work. You work to make it work.
Bottom line: Much in the world will remain in the realm of the impossible … until someone like you proves it’s not! Decide what you’re passionate about. Learn what others have done to push it as far as it can be pushed. Then figure out a way to prove it can be pushed even further … or, perhaps, in an entirely different direction!
2. Believe who you are and who you work to become is important
What it means: You are a lump of clay in your own hands to mold and form into your own liking. Every decision you make, every choice, every step, every thought, every action you take or fail to take are the building blocks of who you become, each adding to the whole, constructing the total you. You therefore believe that how you live your life matters.
What it does: You live a life of character. You prioritize your personal growth and development. You work to improve your mind and overcome self-defeating habits and feed your soul with soul-edifying literature. You value your values and work to live by integrity to them.
Bottom line: Let your values sink deeply into the fabric of your soul, let it fuse with the flesh of your heart, let it work its way into your feet and your finger tips and course through your veins, affecting everything you do and say and think and feel. The result will be greater confidence and self-worth and happiness and joy.
3. Believe most people are basically decent
What it means: You’re not naïve, but you are also basically trusting. You don’t second-guess or ascribe ill-intent to others’ motives and behavior. You take them and life at face value unless they give you a good reason not to. You take appropriate preventive and self-protective measures, but you don’t walk around in a perpetual state of fear and distrust.
What it does: You enter into relationships freely and openly. You are not so guarded by distrust that others find it difficult to get to know you. Because you believe most people are decent people, you associate with those who value you and who support your moral convictions.
Just as you would never hang out with fatally contagious people, you won’t hang out with morally contagious ones. You know there are many others who share your decency and seek them out and attract them to you.
Bottom line: Seek to surround yourself with people of character. Seek to lift those who struggle in that department. Take appropriate precautions, but don’t hide in the corners of life worrying about the next swindle.
4. Believe imperfection is okay
What it means: You believe that it’s important to learn and grow, but you’re patient with yourself in the process. You’re okay with stumbles, trips and skinned knees. Failure is not some giant out to crush you, but a friend out to teach you.
What it does: Perfectionism in the enemy to action. It can stall and derail our plans and goals as we get chained to the need to force ourselves into the precise box of perfection, fitting into some preconceived impossibility, trapped in the cell of flawlessness. Believing perfection is not necessary, you take risks to step toward your goals, sometimes willingly stumbling in the dark as you go.
Bottom line: No mortal is perfect. We can’t be. But here’s the good news: We don’t even need to be. Allow yourself the right to be imperfect. Give yourself permission to fall short. If things go badly, learn from the mistakes made rather than beat yourself up for being human enough to make them.
5. Believe the miraculous
What it means: It’s a miracle when a person who has spent most of his life lost finally finds his way home again. It’s a miracle when someone stuck in life finds a way forward again. It’s a miracle when we fall down then find a way to get back up again.
The miraculous is revealed when life is so seemingly stacked against us, when the past is a chain and the present is a vice and the future seems so dark and bleak and ugly, and we stand up and take steps into that darkness anyway, pushing and digging and breaking through to an amazing life of deep significance and joy.
What it does: Life is a miracle. Love is a miracle. Selflessness is a miracle. We breath. We sing. We read. We communicate across oceans. We heal. We overcome. We mourn for others. Others mourn for us. You believe these things to be miraculous. And so we appreciate life in deeper ways. We recognize the Author of the miraculous in life. We are filled with gratitude and wonder and awe. And we are thereby also filled with more happiness and joy as well.
Bottom line: Accept the miraculous by seeing it in the wind and the rose pedal, the baby’s smile and an act of forgiveness. And see it in the mirror, because you, my dear friend, are a miracle too.
Just believe.
Afterthoughts
Belief is a powerful thing in determining the outer limits of what’s possible for each of us.
Every choice, and thought, and action we take, our habits, beliefs, ideas, interpretations, assumptions, ideologies, attitudes and behavior create an unmistakable trajectory for our lives. We are thereby pointed down a particular path.
But we can change that trajectory by simply changing some mix of thought, belief and action. If we want to change the road we’re on or the target our life circumstances are currently pointing us at, we simply have to change the decisions we make.
What we believe creates the context for what’s possible in our lives, for how we approach those decisions to be made. So choose your beliefs carefully and go create a life of beauty, significance and meaning.
In the comments, please share other beliefs that can reshape our lives and lead us to greater success and happiness. I’ll credit and link to your site in a follow-up post when you add a belief I haven’t yet added. Check out the previous list of 5 beliefs by clicking here: 5 Beliefs that will Radically Change Your Life Forever Then add what I’ve missed.
So far, the following have added additional beliefs I missed (in the comments of 5 Beliefs that will Radically Change Your life Forever):
John Sherry: “Believe it’s going to get better”
Steve Bloom: “Believe you can change your life”
Lori Gosselin: “Believe that life will go on”
Galen Pearl: “Believe the universe is friendly” (as in not hostile)
Add and be mentioned and linked in an upcoming post!
And as long as you’re in a sharing mood, Tweet and Share on Facebook! All the cool people are doing it! 🙂
Photo courtesy of Pixabay
Hi Ken,
Powerful example of “belief’s” right here. These are core beliefs and as such create a solid foundation. Our ‘other beliefs’ may come & go as we journey through Life. I have a strong belief that “Our Imagination is our key to learning”…….without it we will not discover anything beyond our self imposed boundaries. Thankyou
be good to yourself
David
David Stevens recently posted … Living Life Today – Thoughts that catch the heart are incredibly important
Thanks David!
I like the way you put that: core beliefs versus those that change over time as we grow and (hopefully!) mature. It’s a great point you make that imagination is necessary to break through some of those current beliefs that are self-limiting. One way we can change or update our limiting beliefs is to imagine ourselves without them, with better more self-affirming beliefs about who we are and what we can do. Goals are largely the construct of imagination. Change requires the imagination to see ourselves differently, to even question our assumptions about our limitations.
Such an important insight you added here, David.
Thanks for sharing!
Hi Ken,
I am new here.
Your last two articles on beliefs are powerful in helping people transform from mediocre living to enlightened living. I had this personal transformation not too long ago which revealed a lot of negative beliefs in me that resulted in where I was in life – we cannot do certain things, humans have limits, riches are for certain people only, you need to work hard to achieve things and more.
But now, I am living differently with many new and unleashing beliefs. I think what’s most fiundamental for me is that nothing is impossible now and we can all make a difference. these two beliefs on its own will move mountains for us to do things that will benefit many more people in this world.
May I also add the following beliefs that I think is important:
1) Believe that there is enough abundance for all. There is no need to hog our own possession because there is more than enough.
2) Believe that good people exist to help you. I used to believe that no one will help when difficult times come, but I was wrong.
Cheers
Jimmy recently posted … The Needs of Our Souls for Inspired Living
Hi Jimmy!
Welcome to M2bH!!! So glad you found your way here. Actually, though, you have been here some time ago before, but the site looked very different. So I’m not surprised you don’t recognize it. But I do remember you. 🙂
You said something here that I think is a wonderful way of looking at changing our beliefs from limiting to empowering: You said you unleashed your beliefs. I love that imagery of your true potential being unleashed, breaking free, soaring!
I also love your additions: Believe in an abundance mentality (too many people live in the darkened shadows of a scarcity mentality, believing life is a zero-sum game, for sure!). I wonder what it would be like if I believed there were only selfish jerks out in the world. Would not be a very friendly place to live.
Thanks for the input, Jimmy! Great insights into what will free us to rise to our limitless potential!
This is great Ken! I so believe in the power of our thoughts! I like the ones you added here – I can’t even pick a favourite – I like them all! I like the one John Sherry added too – believe that it’s going to get better (somebody tell the bad-news media – please!)
This needs to be explored in school. Children come out of all kinds of early-childhood situations and grow up with the beliefs given to them without questioning them. Augh!
My husband told me today that they report the food kitchens are serving more and more people these days. His sister has been volunteering for years and she’d becoming discouraged. My husband observed that a child brought to a soup kitchen is a likely candidate to return later with his or her own children. It’s not a rule, but it becomes a belief about the way the world “works”.
Kudos to Steve Bloom too for adding “believe you can change your life.”
Lori
Lori Gosselin recently posted … What Would You Bring to a Desert Island?
Thanks Lori! So true – the power of thought to shape our lives is truly profound. And I agree with you about John’s addition. But the belief that life will go on even after circumstances in life make it seem like maybe it won’t is also a pretty darn good one too! 🙂 I like what one social commentator in our area has said about the media, especially television news: it’s a proctologist’s view of the world. Gross, but so true!
Wow! So sad about the children following in their parents footsteps, right back into the soup kitchen. I guess our beliefs truly are self-fulfilling prophesies! We experience life a certain way and that influences our beliefs about life and about ourselves, which reinforce what we believe, which strengthens the grip our beliefs have on what we do, and so on.
I think the way to end that self-perpetuating process is exactly what you suggested: education. The particulars, however, are another story — and one we’ve wrestled with a bit there at Life, for instance! 🙂
Hello Ken
How are you?
Thanks for contributing to this month’s edition of the magazine. I really appreciate it and I look forward to Decembers article (please look out for my email)
Each belief listed in the article is definitely one to live by/hold on and it actually contributes to developing/experiencing ones purpose.
There are times when the seeds of doubt weigh one down and sometimes all we need to do is remember past victories and how we conquered difficult situations.
This stirs up hope within and we are able to believe the impossible, the miraculous…
May I also suggest that having a reasonable level of self worth causes one to believe in who they are despite the oppositions/hurtful words, negativities…..
Self worth also gives one the ability to embrace ones imperfections with a view to working on it. Imperfections in certain areas soon become a thing of the past because our belief promotes patience as well as humility so we can take things on board.
Thanks for sharing this ken
Take care of yourself and enjoy the rest of the day
Hey Ayo!
I’m doing just wonderfully, thank you! Hope all is well with you and you’re family.
It is always my privilege to be considered worthy of contribution to LSM! It’s an impressive publication with impressive thinkers on board. Thanks for including me among those I so admire!
That is an interesting phrase you used, Ayo: seed of doubt. So true. All seeds produce fruit. Some sweet and delicious and some bitter and sour. There are beliefs that do the same: some produce sweet and delicious lives of joy and opportunity and other beliefs produce bitterness and sour lives of disappointment and negativity.
You share some important words of wisdom here: a strong sense of self-worth does act as a protective covering against opposition and hurtful words. It also keeps our imperfections in perspective. They are kept from defining who we are. We are not our mistakes, we only made some. Great insight, Ayo. Thanks for deepening the conversation!
Be good, my friend!
Another great post Ken. Well put, and written excellently. I agree with all your points. I always get beat up for #3 , I always see good in people, and believe almost everyone is a good person, people criticize me for this, and say I need to look around etc. Is there something wrong with this? I think its very rare to find people that see good in everyone. What do you think? Rochelle.
Rochelle recently posted … South Africa Takes Control at Provinces to Tighten Spending
Thank you so much, Rochelle!
You ask an important question. I’ve been in those same kinds of conversations. Here’s my take on it:
I don’t believe that all people are good. There are, in fact, rapists and murderers, child molesters and suicide bombers.
But most people are not suicide bombers. Most people don’t rape or molest or murder. Only a very tiny fraction of the population do. Most people try to live their lives with honor and dignity. Most people believe honesty is good and look up to people like Gandhi and Mother Teresa and other moral giants. Most people recognize there is something in such people worthy of admiration. Most people fall short of our values and ideals. But they mean well and still work to treat others decently.
We do need to take reasonable precautions against those who are not as committed to decency as most people are. I would never take a walk alone at night in neighborhoods that are known for their rampant gang activity. I would never lend a stranger or anyone but a good friend, for that matter, my credit card to go buy lunch while I run some errands.
But I do believe most people mean well even when they fail to do well. I believe most people care for others and would like to be thought of as good and decent people.
What this does is keep me from worrying about being ripped off and taken advantage of at every turn. I Believe the world is a good place to live (even if there are some bad people doing some bad things in it). I therefore love life and people and take tremendous pleasure in both.
I guess I can sum it up this way: There are storms and earthquakes and tsunamis. But usually, the world is a pretty darn good place to live. Most of the time, tornadoes don’t threaten us and typhoons don’t destroy our homes — even though sometimes they do. So in the end, I still go outside and enjoy life rather than barricade myself in my house afraid to be the next one struck by lightning when I walk outside.
Does this help? I truly hope you don;t lose you belief that most people are good, even while taking reasonable precautions to keep yourself safe. Let me know what you think. I would be very interested to hear your reaction.
PS: Sorry for the wordy reply. But it was just such a great question!
Ken,
This is a wonderful post series! Our beliefs are our foundation as you put it. Unfortanetly for many people we are filled with limiting and distorted beliefs by the time we’re 5 years old! Though as we develop greater self-awareness we have a choice to change our beliefs and begin planting flowers where there once was weeds. Learning to pull the weeds and replace these with flower buds is a start. The weeds will grow back but we can be prepared by having ample and beautiful flowers!
Joe Wilner recently posted … Simple Tips for Mastering Your Emotions
Hey Joe, I like the imagery you painted here! Our hearts and minds are flowerbeds of potential. And the only way to be sure we have a beautiful and fragrant garden is to proactively remove the weeds and plant the flowers, as you said.
Providing us with the flowers is one of the services you provide so well at your site. So keep dishing them out to help us with our personal gardening needs! So much baggage to unpack (to mix metaphors) since 5 years old!
It’s hard to see how people perceive me, but I’m beginning to see that my perception of myself often creates, or influences their perception of me. These 5 Beliefs offer a strong foundation to make changes to my perception and to make changes in my life. Thanks Ken! I’ll read and re-read this one for some time to come.
My pleasure, Rusty! 😉
It’s always a thrill to see you here. I think you are so wise to recognize something perhaps most people never realize: our perceptions of ourselves do influence how we think and act and live; how we think and act and live has a very direct impact on how others see us.
But knowing you, I’m confident people see you in a very positive light. Nonetheless, how we live is what people see. What we believe influences how we live, to be sure.
Thanks for making that connection, here. That was an insightful link I will definitely include in my final post in this series.
Hi Ken,
Believe nothing is impossible is very true. The way I look at it, all great achievements at one time, they were considered to be “impossible” but those great achievers didn’t believe in these limiting beliefs and statements. Everything is possible for us. This is my motto. 😉 Thanks for sharing Ken, great article
Dia recently posted … Falling out of love
Hey Dia,
That’s an awesome motto to ride life with! So empowering. What if everyone shared your motto … and believed it, that everything was possible for them too! What a thought, eh?
Thanks for being here, Dia. Take care, my friend!
Ken, I believe you are quite right – there’s so much positive belief that we can harness and with good reason. When we believe in the, and our, best, we actually create it – we are the spark that belief needs to spring magically to life. Believe that there’s something special and important and stunning that you came here to bring to life and begin looking for the clues and the signposts. Believe that you are the magic and watch what happens…..
John Sherry recently posted … Sports Professionals Wanted
Great points, John.
I think I’ve spotted yet another powerful belief in you comment that I have not included in either post. I like this line: “Believe that there’s something special and important and stunning that you came here to bring to life …” Each of us has something to contribute, something we were meant to do here, a personal mission in life. That’s a powerful belief that can help focus our lives and draw us over obstacles and through barriers as we work to realize that purpose.
Thanks for always adding so much depth and insight here, John. It’s truly appreciated!
I like best – believe you are important and who you are
sometimes our self doubt ruins ourselves
Noch
Noch Noch recently posted … auguries of innocence
Hi Noch!
Yep, self-doubt is the poison that undermines possibility and opportunity and potential as we second-guess and procrastinate and fluctuate indecisively between starting and stopping, trying and quitting.
Thanks for commenting, Noch.
Awesome Post Ken,
It was impossible to run a mile under 4-minutes … until Roger Bannister ran it.
It was impossible to fly … until the Wright Brother showed us it wasn’t.
It was impossible to go to the moon … until Neil Armstrong stepped onto its surface.
I think if people tacked these quotes to their desk or office wall they would realize that impossible has the word possible in it for a reason. Think of all the awesome inventions that someone may have given up on because someone told them it was impossible so they quit without trying, its amazing to think of all the great ideas that have been left in the trash!!
Best
Rick
Rick Vanasse recently posted … Stop living in the past, don’t look in the rearview!
Hi there, Rick!
Thanks for stopping by. I love this: “its amazing to think of all the great ideas that have been left in the trash!!” What a great insight. But what a tragedy too!
What if Edison never turned on the light or Bell never made the “phone” call? What if Lincoln thought it was impossible for a self-made poor boy to become president or Gandhi thought it impossible to do anything about colonial injustices?
The course of history affecting untold numbers of people have been altered by single decisions made by individual historical actors on the stage of life. How many other actors never took the step to get up on that stage who would have improved some part of the world that’s still broken today because they thought it too impossible to reasonably try?
We all need reminders to get up everyday and exercise conviction and courage to step up to the plate of life and keep swinging until the impossible is made the new possible.
Thanks again for your awesome comment here , Rick. Very much appreciated!
[…] more we increase our self awareness, the more we begin to respect the divine flow of all that is. Rather than live in resistance to what is, which in turn creates turmoil in our […]