“Character is the foundation for success and happiness. Just as no worthy building can be erected on a weak foundation, no lasting success or happiness can be built on a weak character.“ ~ Michael Josephson
Everyone everywhere wants to be happier. It ranks up there on the top of most people’s lists of what they most want for their children. But happiness is not only a desirable emotional condition, it produces better human beings.
As a matter of fact, happiness is a moral obligation, as much as kindness and integrity are moral obligations.
You can even think of happiness as our own radio-active spider turning us into nothing less than superheroes. Okay, perhaps overstated slightly, but read on to see why I rank happiness up there with mutant genes, cool utility belts and radio-active insects.
7 reasons Your Happiness Matters
1. Happiness is the Purpose of Life
Someone once said that “happiness is the object and design of our existence.” Aristotle said it this way: “Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence.”
But how can something as fluffy as happiness be deep enough to be the meaning and purpose of life?
Well, if you think happiness is a cool car and $150 in your pocket, then it’s not. Happiness can’t be found on craigslist. But if you have a more accurate understanding of happiness, you likely already know why it’s lofty enough a thing to be considered the purpose of life (I recently shared a few thoughts on the concept with my friend Barrie Davenport here).
The bottom line is that happier people become better people. They spend more time learning and growing. They are more likely to be religious and seek divine guidance in their lives and in their interactions with others. They are more dedicated to nurturing their spiritual selves. The happiest amongst us also tend to be more loving, compassionate, courageous and grateful (see #4).
2. Happiness makes us Better Parents
Think about an unhappy parent. You may have even had one. Chances are your unhappy parent was relatively more isolated, depressed, angry, self-absorbed and inattentive.
Happy parents, to the contrary, make home life a very different experience with more love, acceptance, patience and forgiveness.
3. Happy People Give More
Studies have demonstrated over and over again, that happy people volunteer more, give more to those in need, even hold doors open for others more often than their unhappy friends.
Happy people are more thoughtful, polite and attentive to others needs, picking up verbal and non-verbal cues depressed people miss.
4. Happy People are Better People
Happier people, as already mentioned, are kinder, more compassionate, patient and loving than those experiencing depression.
While studies abound, a little life experience and a dose of common sense is all that’s needed here. Almost everyone knows both happy and unhappy people.
Which are kinder, gentler, more thoughtful and considerate? Which are angrier, more impatient and intolerant? There you have it.
5. Happiness Leads to Greater Life Satisfaction
Happy people are less anxious, less depressed, less stressed, feel better, more optimistic and confident, experience a deeper sense of well-being, have more passion and zest for life, have a stronger sense of meaning and purpose and see the world as essentially a friendly place filled with good people and plenty of opportunity.
Happy people also feel more in charge of their own lives, less acted upon by external forces out of their control. They are less likely to feel like victims to others, God or life. Happy people simply love and enjoy life much more than their gloomier counterparts.
6. Happy People are Healthier and Live Longer
Studies have linked increased levels of happiness and well-being to higher longevity rates with fewer incidents of coronary heart disease. Other studies have shown links between happiness and optimism with lower rates of cardiovascular disease, cancer and other age-related degenerative problems.
Happier people are also less stressed out, experience less anxiety or depression, and are more likely to eat healthy and exercise regularly.
7. Happy People Bounce Back
Not only do happy people experience difficulties and challenges and downright tragedy (it simply is not true that happy people are spared the toughest trials in life), they experience them about as much as unhappy people do. The difference is how happy people deal with and think about and interpret those challenges.
But the bit of news that’s important here, is that when happy people get slapped by life, they bounce back from the slap much quicker than unhappy people do. Then, because they tend to look for meaning and life-lessons in their trials (rather then get stuck angrily ruminating over them), they end up even happier than before the slap ever struck.
In other words, when they fall down, the bounce higher than where they fell from.
Afterthoughts
This post is not meant to guilt you into pursuing happiness. It is meant to inform and motivate. I hope it does.
The bottom line, folks, is that happiness matters. Your happiness matters. It matters most directly to you. But it also matters to your family. It matters to your friends. It matters to your neighbors and associates and customers and community. It even matters to the world.
So make happiness a priority in your life. Read up on it and work at it and make your world a happier place to live in.
Your Turn!
Which of the reasons happiness matters most resonates with you?
What would you have added to the list? In what other ways does happiness matter?
Nicely thought out post.
The part I have trouble with is the
Happy people are better? better than what? Maybe better OFF than sad or depressed people for sure.
Sad people are happy people who are trapped.
Thank you for addressing this.
SW
steve werner recently posted … Competing Mentalities: Scarcity & Abundance
Thanks so much, Steve.
Could you clarify on the “Happy people are better” objection? There are two places I use the phrase: “Better parents” and Better people” (or similarly, “Better human beings”) but then explain under those subheadings what I mean. My guess is the “Better people/human beings” is the part you struggled with?
What I mean by “better people” is more moral, kinder, more likely to do good, help others, more loving, compassionate, more attentive to others. Studies have demonstrated this phenomenon over and over again.
Happy people are more likely to comfort sad people than sad people are. Happy people are more likely to give money to the homeless than the unhappy. Happy people are more likely to be patient with people’s mistakes and forgiving of their faults.
This doesn’t mean that every happier person is kinder than every unhappier person, but the statistics are extremely strong and have been duplicated over and over again, including in different regions of the world and a large variety of cultures.
A great book that covers the scientific side of happiness and recounts and references the studies I suggested underscore my claim is Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky’s The How of Happiness. It’s a good read and makes a good case for the link between happiness and goodness.
Thanks so much for making me clarify, Steve. Let me know if I missed the mark.
Now it’s my turn! 😉
I’m not quite sure what you mean by “Sad people are happy people who are trapped.” That seems to me to be something similar to saying imprisoned people are free people who are trapped (in prison). Or unhealthy people are healthy people who are sick. Or short people are tall people who are not tall yet.
If the characteristics of something physical or emotional or spiritual or anything else suggest a particular condition, what’s it mean to call it the opposite of what the characteristics describe? Everyone is everything good, but trapped, in that case. All murderers are descent, but trapped in their murderous ways. All rapists are moral, but trapped in their ravenous immorality. All rude people are trapped kind people. And all cancer-ridden people are healthy, just trapped in a state of cancer.
Anyway, that’s how I look at it. But I’m opened to being schooled! Let me know if my thinking is off!
And thanks again for the comment (and forgive my long reply!) 🙂
It doesn’t matter if you are happy or sad or depressed time will pass either way and you are gonna die one day, It doesn’t matter to be happy in your life.
These are all absolute truth, Ken. I’ve been working on keeping things like this in mind because it does make a huge difference in the way we treat ourselves as well as people around us. Having allowed myself to live in long periods of UNhappiness at various points in my life, I can see the vast difference in perspective. And it does take effort – happy people aren’t simply happy. I think they have chosen to be happy. As my Grandfather used to say, “you are only about as miserable (insert any word you like…miserable, happy, sad, angry…) as you allow yourself to be.” We control our feelings, our reactions, our mindset. Is it difficult to be in the one we want at a given moment? Yes, sure. But that’s the difference. If we want to be happier, we will work through the difficulty and find a way to try to move to the better place. It’s not a quick fix and it does take effort. Everything worth having is full of difficulty – many a great thinker has expressed that idea. So then the question we have to ask our Self is whether our own happiness is worth the effort to work for it.
Lisa recently posted … Soup of the Week – Trifecta Edition
Most all of us have had that both the crabby aunt or uncle and the sweet, happy one that made you feel special. Those anecdotal experiences have been supported time and time again in the research. Happy people are friendlier, kinder and more uplifting on average than their crabby counterparts. As a pretty happy person myself, there are times I’m not feeling so on top of the world and it often shows in my tone and lack of patience. So you make a great point about how we treat ourselves and others. Sounds like I would have really liked your Grandfather. His words come real close to Lincolns! That would have been a powerful thing to grow up hearing.
Thanks for adding to the conversation, Lisa. I always love reading what you have to say! Lots of wisdom!
Thanks, Ken. I enjoy reading over here – your blog is a great reminder of how much there is in life to be happy about and that it is indeed a choice. It’s easy to let life get the best of us so sometimes it helps to get a little inspiration.
You know, I guess my Grandfather does sound a bit like Lincoln – who, incidentally, is one of my favorite thinkers. Coincidence? Probably not. But yes, my Grandfather’s words were very powerful for me. I owe much of who I am to him.
Lisa recently posted … Ten Things of Thankful – Just Under the Wire
Great stuff Ken, as always. Further to #3, you will find this NY Times piece of interest…
helping others changes your genetics in a way that makes you happier. http://nyti.ms/177A4q2
Best regards,
David
David J. Singer recently posted … Discovering What You Already Have: A Happiness Secret
Thanks for sharing that link, David. That was an interesting read. So white blood cells are where it’s at, eh? The science of happiness has been an interesting trend to watch. So much being scientifically reinforced. But also shining new light on new ideas that help clarify what to do about human happiness.
Keep up the work you do, my friend!
I often think that happiness is undervalued because it is actually so easy to have – it is simply a mindset. Not much of a goal, it seems..”meh, I don’t want to be happy, I want to work hard and make a fortune. That’s a goal that will make me happy” LOL.
Hey Ron, there’s some interesting studies on the relationship between goals and happiness. It’s true that setting and reaching for goals does, in fact, improve happiness. But be careful about the kind of goals you set if happiness is what you’re after. Turns out that “making a fortune” goals don’t work. There’s all sorts of science behind that conclusion too. A quick Google search will yield as much evidence as needed for that premise.
As for the ease of happiness, it depends on where you’re coming from. Someone whose attitude is generally elevated or who has few other obstacles to happiness may simply need a mindset shift and viola! They’re happy. And even for those, mindsets can be tricky things to deeply or permanently shift making happiness more fleeting than it needs be.
Still, for others, happiness doesn’t come so easily, whether because of unkind genetics or childhood histories that were horrific or character flaws that have been practiced for decades, some find making the needed attitudinal and behavior changes very difficult.
Happiness is probably the meaning of life. I have lived most of my life, feeling something in between contentedness and depression, and I’ve had it. So I decided to actively pursue things that make me happy. I’m done making snarky comments at people that always smile, and instead, I’ll become one myself!
I would perhaps add that, happiness also improves ones performance at work. So it should be the prime concern of the employer, whether or not his employees are actually happy. I know it will be mine if I ever start a business!
Ragnar recently posted … Preparation: The Not-So-Secret Secret Behind Good Luck
Very cool, Ragnar! It’s amazing what a flip in attitude can do. I still remember the process that led to my changed attitude. It’s a process and often takes time. There are few magic bullets in real life. Changed attitudes take effort to establish as new patterns of thinking and seeing and interpreting life. A smile helps. But a smile that reflects an inner changed emotional tide is much more permanent.
Your addition is perfect. I should have added it, so thank you for bringing it into the conversation. It’s so true that happiness affects productivity and should therefore be a concern of every business owner.
A recent report, as a matter of fact, shows how unengaged American workers are at work. They’re bored and feel like their work life lacks meaning and purpose. But happy people carry their sense of meaning with them and bring their happiness into the office, into their interactions with suppliers and customers and others the business relies on to succeed.
Just curious: Do you have entrepreneurial aspirations?
PS: Love your name, b y the way. Names don’t get much more ruggedly masculine than that!
I’m not the standard entrepreneur type of person I think. I’ve never “hustled” much or been very money motivated, but on the other hand, at about 16 I grew infatuated with the idea of making money on the internet. Being self employed, living in a different country every few years, things like that. One of my long term dreams was being a writer, which falls under the same categories as far as lifestyle is concerned at least. So if I ever end up being a boss, it would be the byproduct of solo success and “scaling” as business types call it I think. If I end up with a lot of money I hope I would use it to start a non profit, or just donate a lot of it and hope people follow by example… I heard it can change people though, money that is.
Glad to be of help. And that makes perfect sense to me. I think virtually any job can benefit from a better mood and some extra energy.
Also, thank you, I get that quite a bit from non-Norwegians, haha. It’s actually most common among older men in Norway, so growing up I had mixed feelings about it.. but I have grown to like it a lot. Stems from the viking age and means something like powerful warrior, so I’m not sure it can, no. Not that name has much to do with actual manliness, haha.
Ragnar recently posted … Preparation: The Not-So-Secret Secret Behind Good Luck
You’ll be excited then to keep your eye on the newer brand of entrepreneurs (especially online entrepreneurs) who are much more likely to chase their passion than the dollar. They may make a bundle of money pursuing it, but their wealth is a byproduct of what they do, not the main aim and goal. Still, they take their businesses seriously and work to grow them because they truly believe what they offer has true value.
Sounds like you and I are kindred spirits, Ragnar! While I didn’t start as early as you, I’ve definitely become infatuated with the thought of being a writer and being able to write from anywhere in the world as well. That’s one of the reasons I started blogging, as a matter of fact.
I laughed when I read what you said about your name. I know what you mean. You just don’t find very many people named Ken running around these days either.
It’s great to consider happiness as a state that comes first — in other words, it’s not fully dependent on external circumstances, but rather something that generates circumstances.
CJ recently posted … Profound Meditation Program 3.0 by iAwake Review
I really like the way you put that, CJ: “it’s not fully dependent on external circumstances, but rather something that generates circumstances.” Well and wisely said!
Happiness does indeed generate circumstances. It sets tones and creates contexts and develops conditions and has consequences that are largely predictable–on health, relationships, character and, of course, on our emotional lives as well.
Grateful for your two cents, CJ.
Wonderful post, it definitely motivates me to be happy in my life.
I’m so glad to hear that, Ashley.
Whenever I talk about the moral responsibility of happiness, I’m always a little concerned someone will feel less happy as guilt overcomes their motivation. So to hear you’re motivated to be happier thrills me. You made my day, Ashley!
Hi Ken – just got an alert about this post on Google+ right after I had posted on my own blog about why I run – it makes me happy – and about how important it is for me to be happy!! So I linked from my blog to your post because it fit together so perfectly!! Great post, I absolutely agree. While I have been blessed not to experience real tragedy in my life, I have seen how unhappiness can undermine people with great potential, amazing gifts and the chance to enjoy their lives. Again, excellent post.
Elizabeth Pagel-Hogan recently posted … Reasons for Running
Thanks for the link, Elizabeth! Glad our posts came together that way. That is such a sad line you wrote (quite eloquently, I might add): “I have seen how unhappiness can undermine people with great potential, amazing gifts and the chance to enjoy their lives.” I’ve seen the same thing and it’s just heartbreaking to me.
Ken, I have a very good mind to just quietly take this post and put it on my blog 😀 because it fits perfectly with my Sept 1-7 blogging theme “Seven” and the topic makes my heart beat.
7 reasons..I can think of countless reasons to be happy! Happy people have open minds, which, for me, is the foundation for all things positive. They are flexible, non-judgmental because they can see the other side of things, find it easier to show love and of course spread their sunshine wherever they go.
I love this post. We celebrated Teacher’s Day in India yesterday, and I thought of you. Happy Teacher’s Day to you!
Much love, Vidya
Vidya Sury recently posted … Book Review Promote Yourself
You are such a sweetheart, Vidya! You always seem to give the most awesome compliments in the funniest ways! I’ve been having a lot of fun reading you 7-series posts. I suppose I was channeling you when I stopped on that number.
You always have a most upbeat and happiness-inducing things to say about happiness. When you talk about the subject, your own happiness seems to bounce off the screen.
And thank you so much for the Happy Teacher’s Day wishes, Vidya!